Hello! And welcome to our Friday column, Worst of the Week. There’s a lot of nutty stuff that goes on in this industry, so this column is a chance for us at RCRWireless.com to rant and rave about whatever rubs us the wrong way. We hope you enjoy it!
And without further ado:
This week we were reminded again of the power of words. And in this case when I say we, I mean Sprint Nextel’s stock price. And when I say “words” I mean “underperform.”
Like the grades on my earliest report cards, Sprint Nextel got labeled this week by a financial analyst with that “D” grade tag, having knocked the carrier down from its previous “market perform” label, which I liken to a C-minus. Right around average, with just a hint of snarkiness to bring on the “minus.”
The downgrade was enough to send already worried Sprint Nextel stockholders running to their metal bunkers, or at least to sell off some of their stocks. With how much the stock market fluctuates on a minute-by-minute basis (thank you day traders!) this was not really much of a shock. Plus, with Sprint Nextel’s recent operational trials and tribulations, one could almost call a seismic fluctuation “Tuesday” in the world of Sprint Nextel.
However, this whole downgrading business brought up another issue for me in that it was amazing to see how much power one word from amongst millions had coming from one financial analyst amongst millions. Sort of scary, really.
Now, I know the stock market is just a cruel joke used by those who control all the money on those of us who can’t make it too Las Vegas often enough. But, for those corporations that have their names bandied about by crazed zombies on trading floors, the use of such innocuous terms like “underperform,” “market perform” and “poor form” cuts pretty close to the bone.
Obviously, this analyst that put Sprint Nextel into time out was not saying anything that just about every impartial observer did not already realize. I think most would recognize that Sprint Nextel has some huge issues ahead of it that are likely to impact its ability to “perform” at “market” levels in the near term. Heck, I see at least 9 issues in my near term that will likely impact my ability to perform like an adult.
But, to see that doubt cast in such a public way makes those of us that live a life of “underperform” feel almost sorry for those just barely passing folks at Sprint Nextel. I suggest that just like all those “participation” ribbons that I still treasure from my childhood athletic career, we provide some sort of “atta boy” for those wireless companies that despite what seems like their best efforts, just can’t seem to get out of their own way.
Some passive-aggressive suggestions for ratings:
–You have a great personality!
–Wow, those colors look good on you!
–Great plan for next year, too bad the world is going to end!
–Impressive how you got those 100 monkeys to type!
–I am sure that sounded like a great idea in your head!
What stockholder could not take some comfort in the fact that their life savings are invested in a company that knows how to color coordinate? Exactly.
OK, enough of that.
Thanks for checking out this week’s Worst of the Week column. And now for some extras:
–Finally, a business model even I can understand. NetZero and FreedomPop look to be going where no one thought possible by offering something for nothing. In this case, it’s a finite amount of wireless broadband service for free. Sweet.
Now, I am no numbers person, but this seems to me to be a sure bet of a business plan. These two companies offer me something for free that they have to in turn pay for. I don’t see how this could fail.
Plus, both services are running on Clearwire’s WiMAX network, which I am going to blindly assume is robust and backed by a carrier with ample financial support and plans to continually update its network in order to serve what will be hundreds of millions of people too smart to not take advantage of this offer.
Done and done.
–I have for some time bemoaned the blandness that the smartphone revolution has brought to the design of mobile handsets, with every black slab of a device looking just like every other. I have also claimed that the one company that could save us from this slab abyss was Nokia, which back when it was a vibrant competitor in the market put out some of the most outlandish handsets on the market.
Well, now it looks like Nokia is turning its design genius into a more personal solution having recently gained a patent for a tattoo that would vibrate to alert the tattoo-y that a call or text message was coming into their mobile device. Sure, the tattoo is not one of those permanent ones that all the cool kids on television have, but still … this is pretty cool.
Plus it’s one step closer to the eventuality of having our mobile communications devices implanted into our bodies. Ah, the future.
–So, wait. If I have a higher speed mobile broadband connection, I am going to blow through my limited bucket of data faster? How am I supposed to have my cake and eat it too?
–Get ready to throw that spankin’ new smartphone at your nearest enemy. With Google’s Android Ice Cream Sandwich upgrade ready to start infiltrating devices, the company that never rests is readying its slightly more melt resistant Jelly Bean update for later this year. Nothing gets consumers more excited than realizing that the awesome phone they just bought is already outdated. I believe that’s called progress.
–Hard to believe that something as innocent as Facebook could somehow be linked to people that can’t get enough of themselves. Is it the constant feeling that people really want to know what you are doing every second of every day? If that’s narcissistic … well … I guess it is.
I welcome your comments. Please send me an email at [email protected].
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